


Wear a Coat!

by WM_WM_WM



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, M/M, Winter, ZaDE to ZaDF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-07 14:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21738829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WM_WM_WM/pseuds/WM_WM_WM
Summary: Zim finds out the hard way about how cold winter can be. Fortunately, Dib is there to save his skin, whether he likes it or not.
Relationships: Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 91





	Wear a Coat!

Zim shifted in his cheap, plastic chair. He twirled his fingers around a pen, which was supposed to be taking notes. However, the cold seeped into his mind, agonizingly distracting him from his note taking. The freezing air seeped into his flesh, making him quiver. In the past few days, he agonizingly observed the weather becoming colder and colder. The temperature, in just a week, had plummeted like a man off of a skyscraper. On Irk, Zim had never experienced such freezing weather. However, the dirty earth creatures were all cozy in fuzzy coats and jackets! Scanning the freezing classroom, he noticed he was the only one in the room shivering. He gritted his chattering, zipper-like teeth, feeling envious. No, he would never wear a stupid human-made jacket! No Invader would stoop so low.

Dragging him out of his freezing daydream, a girl on the other side of the classroom loudly squealed. "Look! It's snowing!"

"What is _snowing_?" Zim wondered, as all of the children crowded to the window.

Curious, he stuck his head up like a periscope to see above the crowd of kids that scampered from their seats to peer outside. His jaw went slack, as he observed weather that would surely spell out his doom. Little white flakes delicately fluttered from the sky to pile onto the ground. The sky was blocked out by a dense, grey cloud, which was mass-producing the snowflakes. Zim assumed that the white flakes of death were made of water.

He bit his lip, as the kids shrieked, "We wanna play in the snow!"

Ms. Bitters commanded them to sit back down, but the children produced so much noise that she caved in.

"I'll give you extra homework!" she threatened.

Either the kids didn't hear her in the shuffling on of coats, or they didn't care. They tore open the door, and stampeded down the hall. Ms. Bitters, scowling, took up the rear, dragging Zim out of his seat.

"No! You will not torture me with your deadly weather patterns!" he shrieked, but the teacher yanked on his uniform collar, choking his voicebox.

Opening the hallway's heavy doors, the outside was worse than what Zim feared. The snow was now falling a little heavier, sparse flakes now forming crystalline clumps. What was once a dry, yellow grass, now quickly laid a white, piercing cold layer; it was speedily growing. He was forced to shuffle from the cold, hard tile of the hallway to the horrible, burning, skin-numbing snow. Zim gritted his teeth, further hating the Earth and its strange, horribly dangerous weather events. Shivering despite his efforts, he waded through the snow, desperately scanning for any hiding spots. His toes immediately turned tingly and numb, despite them being in his boots. He shielded his face with his arm; otherwise, his face would burn, one snowflake at a time. Circling the skool building, he was elated to find that part of the roof uselessly sloped off of the building, providing a sliver of protection from the sky. He bumbled over to the small cover, and desperately bashed his metallic back onto the rough brick. He lowered his arms from his head with a sigh. A fog swirled into the air, and quietly dissipated.

A shrieking alarm played in his head from his PAK; the conditions were too dangerous for his Irken body. A small groan escaped his throat, as he began pacing back and forth in his small rectangle of cover. He furiously rubbed his arms, wishing that his numb fingers had some heat. His mind furiously began concocting escape plans. What if he ran back to his base? He'd surely be punished if someone caught him running away. His bright body harshly contrasted the white snow, so he figured he didn't have a chance. He could slip back inside? It'd be at least a few degrees warmer. His mind was so busy focusing on escape that he didn't notice his nemesis leaning onto the wall until he bumped into him. With a startled yelp, he slipped onto his behind. Dib let out a snort, as the alien clambered back upright, face a deeper shade.

"What's the matter?" Dib egged, "Too wrapped up thinking about your next plan?"

The human's face had a smirk, but it quickly dropped once he gave him elevator eyes. His face was a pale green, which he assumed was not healthy for aliens. His body was chattering harder than an old dryer.

Dib exclaimed, "Oh my god, you're wearing nothing!"

"I-I have clothes on," the Irken argued with chattering teeth. 

Zim stared at him with scorn, despite _him_ being the one nearly freezing to death. Rolling his eyes, Dib unzipped his heavy coat, and shrugged it off. He threw the dark brown coat into his hands, and stuck it out to the shivering alien.

Swiftly turning around on his heel, Zim snapped, "I-I don't need your s-stupid human clothes."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Dib threatened, taking a step towards the alien, "What was that? All I heard was, 'I'm a stupid alien that's freezing to death."

Alarms blared in his mind. He clutched the top of his head, trying to block out the noise that was bouncing around in his head.

"I d-don't... Need..." chattered Zim, who was hunched over.

Dib shifted on his feet, uncomfortable seeing the pain his nemesis was in. That sympathy quickly twisted into anger.

"What is it with your self-destructive alien customs?" he insulted, "You don't wear any human clothes! Only your weird, alien, bright pink uniform. God, you look like a highlighter!"

Zim considered this, as he twisted to glare at the human.

"Self-destructive?" Zim snarled.

The boy felt a shiver of fear run down his spine. For a second, he saw only a freezing, dying animal. They glared at each other. Zim coiled his body back to standing position, though he was hunched over like a mutant.

Attempting to push down a vivid, horrible image, Dib muttered, "Y-yeah."

"I already knew that!" he howled, as he lunged at him with sharp claws.

With a shriek, Dib sidestepped the weak attack. It sent Zim scrambling onto hard concrete, face bashing into hard concrete. Alarms further swamped his consciousness, driving him mad. Blood drained out of his freezing limbs to fuel his dying brain.

Dib remarked angrily, "Remind me to never lock you in a freezer."

Zim moaned, unable to find the will to form words. His limbs shook, as he tried to stand up. They collapsed under his small body. Dib laughed awkwardly. He immediately detested his action, but the alien was so, so pitiful. The alien, devoid of willpower and functionality, laid sprawled on the freezing concrete, body shivering. All emotion drained out of his body, as the alarm bounced around his empty head.

Getting to his knees, Dib reassured, "You really need my help, don't you?"

The alien said nothing, as the boy scraped him off of the concrete, and sat him upright like a baby doll. Zim could barely open his eyes when he draped his heavy, brown coat over him. The human tenderly guided his arms through the coat holes, and he zipped it up for him. Dib smiled, as he pulled the coat's hood over his eyes. Crossing his arms, and giving a slight nod, he admired the alien as if he had just finished a tough art project.

"Better, isn't it?" Dib mentioned.

Zim gave a ghost of a nod, unable to do anything else. After a minute, he felt his body fill up with power. Heat was being restored to his body. The alarm faded away, much to his relief. He wiggled his arms and legs, and his face lit up with ecstasy to observe that they worked again. Zim tucked his knees into the coat.

He quipped, "I should move to Florida."

"Better not," the boy threatened, smiling a little.

The two sat side by side facing the dreary, white outside. Screeching children danced and flailed in the powdery, frozen water flakes. A large group of kids were ducking behind cover, and chucking snowballs at each other.

"I would throw some snowballs at you," Dib commented, "But your face would probably burn off."

"It would." He added happily, "You could see my skull, though!"

"Hey, that'd be pretty cool! Are Irken skulls like human ones?"

Zim shifted his boots away from snow that was shuffling into their space. "Our bones are made up of different stuff, for one," he explained. "But we have teeth-"

"Obviously."

Rolling his eyes, he continued, "-that don't have the weird molar things. It's part of the skull."

"Weird!" Dib commented. He stared at the middle of Zim's face, which was quickly regaining it's normal color. "Do you have nostrils?"

Zim tapped the end of his chin with his finger, which was covered up by the large coat. It seemed to take a lot of work to think about this question.

"I'm not sure," he concluded.

Suddenly, Zim blasted an adorable, high-pitched sneeze. A ginormous trail of disgusting, green, alien snot ran down his face.

"Well," Zim concluded, "That answers that question!"

They laughed, talked, and taunted each other until, a few minutes later, Ms. Bitters screeched for them to come back inside. 

"Can I have my coat back?" he asked, as they heaved themselves off concrete.

"I don't know," Zim responded with a smirk, "Can you?"

"Give me my coat, roach."

The alien screamed, "You'll have to pry it away from my cold, dead body!"

Fortunately for Dib, he eventually got it off of him. Eventually.

The next day, Zim slunk into class with a heavy, purple coat. Dib shambled over to his desk.

"So, I don't have to save you again?"

"Never!"

"Though, uh," Dib mentioned, face taking on a light pink, "Do you want to talk like we did again?"

With a genuinely sweet smile, Zim murmured, "We are enemies, but... I don't see why not!"

**Author's Note:**

> I've re-written the end like three times, but I can't come up with a good one! >:| I guess some stories are like that ;w;


End file.
